What Shook Me To My Core

I want to apologize for having waited so long since my last post.  My confidence as a mother to a child with Asperger's Syndrome was shaken to the core.  I needed time to analyze, re-group, and come up with new solutions that worked.  Then I had to realize that although I have years of experience, a good education and have read almost every book published on Autism Spectrum issues, I just don't know it all. 

What happened that was so disruptive to our lives?

Our wonderfully brilliant son became severely depressed.  After we had experienced more than a year of progress and positive growth, depression and anxiety overcame him to the point he experienced a melt down more severe than ever before.  He approached what I call the danger zone.

What Caused So Much Anxiety? 

Perhaps it was a delayed stress reaction to our move from Oklahoma to Alabama, or the holidays without his grandparents and older brother.  Perhaps it was stress over school work or recent difficulties with friends.  The problem is that everyone experiences stress.  Our children with autism spectrum issues simply don't have the skills to express or release stress that we seem to develop naturally as we grow. It takes extra effort on our part to help them learn to express their feelings in an acceptable manner. 

How Did We, As A Family, Cope?

First, we rallied behind him.  His father and I spent that evening and most of the next day just holding and reassuring him.  I contacted his doctor and his psychologist.  After  medication change and several visits with the psychologist we developed new coping skills.  I talked to other mothers in our autism support group.  I mention that, because we as parents need support too!  

My husband and I also realized that our son had been trying to repress feelings of inadequacy, anxiety and depression until he just couldn't do it anymore.  As a mother, I realized that he needed to know it's okay to express those feelings daily.  We just needed to come up with an acceptable way to do that.

Today, Several Months Later:

After the roller coaster ride, we have started a new routine that includes new suppliments, new medications, new activities and a different approach at the psychologist's office.  Every day is not perfect, nor do I expect it to be.  And I must say, I am more than a bit apprehensive when things seem to run too smoothly.  I try to talk less and listen a lot more, remembering this is a long journey that requires patience and commitment and not a short trip with a sudden solution.